seriously, mom? with the bow?

i'm over you, blogger.

hi! i'm not blogging for a while. big shock, right? i have pictures to frame and cheeks to smoosh. so you'll just have to call me, mom, if you want to know what's going on. ta!

my new camera?

i LURVE it.

random

it amazes me how often i see people carrying bright yellow "Fays" bags. seriously. those are some old bags.

i did, however, just use a "Freddy's" chip clip to close my bag of pretzels.

that's all.

mmmmm, Christmas.

after some thorough taste-testing, Maeve approves of all gifts this Christmas.

Merry Christmas!

maeve's daddy is 29!

dear daddy,

i love you more than squash. and you know how much i love squash.

love, maeve











ps - my superpower would be flight. duh.

2 of 2

oh, those crazy fish.



yeah, so she spends a lot of time in the swing. you would, too, if they made one in your size.

1 of 2

maeve has found her voice, and it appears to be feline.

weddings, weddings everywhere

so last weekend was kim and roman's wedding (yay)! because of that, katie was home (yay)! then, on sunday, katie had to leave (boo). the wedding was a blast - aunt janet had the maevester for the night, so i was free to get my drink on. surprisingly, MUCH harder to catch a buzz than i remember... maybe it's that mommy gene again. irregardless (in case you don't know me, yes, i know it's not a word) we had a stellar time. kim was breathtaking, roman was devastatingly handsome, and despite the sabres' loss, the night couldn't have been better.

after the ceremony, i was waiting outside the chapel, camera ready, awaiting the couple's grand exit from church. it was a windy day, so as they came out kim reached up and used her finger to get the hair out of her face. as luck would have it, that's when i snapped the picture.

this picture.















if you didn't want me at your wedding, kim, you could have just told me.

i'm going to blog... seriously.

i went back to work this week (yay!) so that means i've been away from my little pickle for four whole days (boo!). today is my day off, so i'll be spending it mushing this chubby face. later today, when i decide to put her down, i'm going to upload pictures of kim and roman's wedding. GOOD. TIMES. oh, and i have a video of maeve laughing at katie making elephant noises.

and the monkeys like you!

everything was going so well...

frieken' communists...

i'd be naked without my camera phone

seriously.

working girl

i will officially return to work on october 30th (happy birthday, mary!) some things i'd like to accomplish before going back:
- write thank-you notes. if you haven't gotten one from me, please don't feel bad... no one has.
- replace the moldy shower curtain liners
- figure out why my hair is falling out
- sort though maeve's wardrobe
- get drunk at kim's wedding
- go to the zoo
- shop main street in east aurora
- blog about something interesting

i'm obsessed with her hair

and this is what it looks like when i can't stop brushing it.

the mommy gene

being a mom changes your life in countless ways... the dramatic changes are obvious - i am no longer living for just myself, i've created a life, mike and i are responsible for this tiny person, i like to dress her up, etc.

the subtle changes, however, are what have caught me by surprise...
- i now know what wegmans looks like before 8:00 am
- i can make myself look like i've showered
- i'm borderline obsessed with her bodily functions
- jodi johnston is actually growing on me, despite her obnoxious perkiness at 5:00 am
- the fridge always has fruit in it (why? the baby can't eat it. yet it's just there)
- i realized i know remarkably fewer songs than i thought i did
- i eat kashi

hi there.

i'm back! i have decided to resume my once-weekly posting schedule... maybe more if the spirit moves me. i have a few things to write about - mostly having to do with the smooshy lovable lump i call Maeve. sorry, i know mikey keeps everyone up to date on the babe, but i'm the mama, it's my job. so, to get the ball rolling, here is a little pic i snapped on my camera phone (yes, the phone i swore i didn't need because why on earth would i need a camera in my phone that i will NEVER use).
maeve and i like to play dress-up. and by that i mean i like to play dress-up. maeve usually indulges me through two or three outfits, and then lets me know she's had enough. this picture was probably number three, as evidenced by the protruding lower lip that is saying to me "mom, i really can’t take another costume change, PLEASE stop dressing me! i really mean it! just look at my lip!” but c'mon. a baby in a hoodie? what's cuter than that? not much, i say. not much.

sweet baby maeve

hi all. i don't mean to shock anyone, but i went and had myself a baby. not just any baby, but a perfect baby. and because this perfect little person will only be little for about a minute and a half, i'm taking a break from my shotty-at-best blogging career. i know daddy will keep you up on all the best baby news...

as for me, well, all i can say is it doesn't get any better than this.

contractions

the buffalo news published an article that explained blog was short for web blog.

i wonder if they think brunch is short for breakfast brunch.

pass the pickles

hi! i'm over the anger of the last post, so i would like to share the most wonderful thing to come from ice cream creators for some time: the Edy's Slow Churned. simply put, it's heavenly. now, i've grown partial to the caramel delight, however i see on the web site that there are over 30 flavors... but my local grocer only carries a handful. help a girl out, danny wegman!

envy

To my dear neighbors across the street, Mr. and Mrs. Asshat,

I would like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for the kind note you left on my windshield this morning, complementing me on my fine parking. Unfortunately, I never got to see it, because my sweet husband took it off my car, thinking it may put a damper on my otherwise glorious day off. But then, oh THEN, you were thoughtful enough to call the F***ING police and have them leave me a little note of their own, wrapped in a bright orange wrapper.

Just a few queries: Were you afraid that the 18 inches of driveway I covered would impede your soccer mobile from exiting your 15 foot driveway? Or were you trying to set a good example for the three shrieking terrors that occupy the back seat of said soccer mobile? Perhaps my bumper was blocking the view of your wolf-dog that scares the ever-loving crap out of all passerby's? Did you call 911, or did you actually take the time to look up the phone number of the local precinct? Did you happen to catch my 38-week-pregnant-ass waddling from the car to my house at midnight last night, after parking in the last possible spot on the street, and that somehow made you determined to make me pay?

Well, Mr. and Mrs. Asshat, I envy you. I envy that you have nothing better to do with your ever-loving time than make it your business to be the street parking patrol. I'd love to help you out, but I have to get down to city court. Why? Because I would rather spend 12 hours in the courthouse than pay that ticket, you dick heads.

Sincerely,

Me

i'm sick of the belly...

on the blog, not on me! i lurve the belly. mike and i finished the painting in the baby's room today, and hot damn, i think it looks awesome. if the baby wasn't going to be so damn cute, i'd want the room for my own.

i've graduated to hospital scrubs for work. what that means is that i've outgrown the ones that i bought, so i went down to the ICU and "borrowed" a fer pair of hospital-issue scrubs. they're not nearly as fun as the hot pink ones i own, but they'll do the trick for the next couple weeks. yes, that's right. WEEKS. if this baby cooks for the reccommended time, it will be out just shy of SIX WEEKS. oy.

pregnancy is supposed to induce a long luxurious mane, so i'm trying to grow my hair. it's growing, and i'm on the expressway to mullet-ville, so i'm getting a trim today.

my new favorite thing to do is sit out on the front porch. mike plays his DS, and i read some magazine (and sometimes there's ice cream involved) and we just sit and talk and watch the world go by... it's heavenly.

view from the top

priorities

Dear Mr. President,

I understand the need for you to be on television from time to time. I can even come to grips with the fact that sometimes it's necessary for you to be on during prime time. But Sir, please, PLEASE, the next time you are going to pre-empt my favorite sit-com, would you please do me the courtesy of alerting me ahead of time. My DVR did not recognize your little speech, and thus cut off the final 20 minutes of my show... and it was the season finale, thank you very much.

Thanks for nuthin',

Lisa

the baby NEEDS this

blah blah blah BABY blah blah blah PREGNANT...

hope you don't mind that this blog has recently become all about being prego, but that's pretty much what i have goin' on lately.

so i went to weggies today. going hungry is never a good idea. going hungry and 7 months pregnant is nothing short of ludacris.

things that found their way into my cart:

pudding cups
dark chocolate covered raisins*
snapple*
tortilla chips
salami
cinnamon toast crunch
alfredo sauce
deli cheese*
extra large lady fingers (the cookies, not an actual fat lady’s fingers)
chocolate ice cream
bologna*

*things i actually consumed before i left the store

checking out at the register with empty packages? not as embarrassing as you may think.

barefoot and pregnant

here's a little pic that mike snapped last night (while giggling at the fact that his wife actually was barefoot and pregnant). the belly has definitely made a name for itself... baby G is due to emerge in exactly 10 weeks. 10 WEEKS, people. luckily, we've recently acquired a basinett, so the baby won't be sleeping in a drawer for the first weeks of life. and we have some diapers. and a LOT of really cute baby clothes, most of them with monkeys on them, so we're all set.

at work, there is an adorable little Italian man that i've been taking care of, and his family is a cast of thousands. according to them, no one is allowed to mention any particular kind of food in front of me, because by doing so, the baby may develop a birth defect. seriously. these people are incredibly sweet, and i humor them by staying tight-lipped about what i may be craving at that particular moment, but they really believe this to be the case. and Italians out there? is this common knowledge and i've just never heard of it?

regardless, i'm starving.

--Updated!

I've wanted to post for a while, now. Yes, I want to share my random innermost thoughts, and sure I have some great things going on that I could talk about, but mostly, I just want to see "--Updated!" next to Marshmallow World on Mikey's blog.

So... in the 20 days since I last posted, my belly has grown significantly. I've gone from wearing clothes that kind of show that I maybe might have a little pot belly possibly protruding over my waistband, to THIS IS SUCH A BABY UP IN THIS BELLY AND I AM WEARING THIS OUTFIT SO YOU WILL DEFINITELY KNOW THAT I AM PREGNANT AND DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK ME WHEN I'M DUE, AND HERE, I'LL RUB MY BELLY A LITTLE FOR ADDED EFFECT SO YOU'LL KNOW IT'S NOT JUST A BEER GUT. so yeah, I'm enjoying the belly.

The baby is a rock star, by the way. It seriously moves so much that it freaks me out, but then when I say to someone "ooh! come feel the baby kicking!" it stops. The little monkey is mocking me before it's even born. Well done, monkey.

I'm posting this now, and hoping for some instant gratification when I switch over to the Royal Toybox... if it's as exciting as I think it will be, I will be forced to post again. Ta!

10 opinions (and a few facts) for Friday

1. feeling a baby move inside your belly is amazing - freaky deaky weirder than weird - but amazing

2. i just saw a commercial that said kids need a booster seat in the car until they are 4'9''. wow. i just make the cut.

3. pants with a panel? you need some.

4. the armchair in our livingroom is covered with white socks. i'm ok with that.

5. i'm making mashed potatoes out of a box tonight. i'm ok with that, too.

6. my in-laws are flying across the pond this afternoon to Ireland. i hope they see sarah!

7. my favorite wife on Big Love is Jeanne Tripplehorn.

8. mike and i bought paint for Baby G's room today!

9. i laughed out loud yesterday when mike and i drove by a place called Le Nails and mike told me it was a french hardware store.

10. it's peep season!

all growns up

yes, i'm 28 years old.
yes, i'm married.
yes, i'm going to be a mother.
yes, i did go to church this morning.
no, i did not set my clocks ahead last night.

yes, people did snicker as we walked in an hour late.

St. Patrick's Day was 12 days ago, but...

this was still worth posting. to sum up:

• little hats are fun

• mike can, and will, make friends with anyone

• being the sober sister actually was a lot of fun... and it was a lot more fun because of this

don't see it? how about in this shot

so. much. laughing.

can't smile without you

for the last few years, mike and i have spent st. patrick's day in destination cities...

first in new york:

and then in chicago:

this year, we stayed in the good 'ol Lo of Buff, and despite my lack of alcohol consumption, the event was no less memorable. my favorite things?

(see next post! my picture limit was hit...)

seriously.

i will update this blog, honestly i will.

right now, though, i have to get to mcdonalds for one last shamrock shake.

too much garlic?

nursing is an extremely rewarding profession... that goes without saying. on top of that, however, patients and their families will often give small gifts to their nurses - symbols, if you will, of their appreciation for the care you have given their loved one. in the past, i've received cards, cookies, letters, pens (the really neat kind that you get from drug reps), etc.

last week, after caring for a patient for a few days, her brother gave me a token of his appreciation...















i can take a hint.

Toys in here, Towels in here, and Lisa in here.

honk

my sister tackled a goose yesterday. literally, she leapt at it and took it down. she said it sounded like you would expect a bagpipe to sound if you tackled it: "MAERRRRAAAAAAGH"

funny!

in other news, i'm wearing denim overalls that i bought as a halloween costume because they're the only remotely comfortable "can wear out and get away with it" pants that i have left. pants with a panel, here i come!

baby love

Want to meet my baby?

what. the. hell.

this makes me sad. very, very sad.

freaked my freak

this story gave me the shivers when i first heard it.

yesterday's super bowl party was a rousing success... the game between the "yellows" and the "teals" was even moderately entertaining. waaaaayyyy too much food was consumed, but by God it was good. best friends were made, drivers were designated, and mike won thirty bucks in the football pool.

my favorite commercials? ameriquest's "don't judge too quickly."

anyone want to return bottles with me?

breaking the silence

alright already. even i'm sick of looking at the special baby (which, by the way, is 16 weeks old!)

my first order of business: Love Monkey.

it. is. awesome.

first of all, it's title couldn't be better. i have no idea what it means, but like bean dog, it's just good.

secondly, jason priestly is in it. i don't care if you weren't a big 90210 fan - it's nice to see an older, slightly chubbier Brandon Walsh.

third and lastly, the music. in the second episode, there is a great little cameo by ben folds, one of mike's all time fave's. shortly there after, Tom has lunch with the female love interest, Julia, during which she lists her top 5 songs of all time. she had great picks - U2, the cure, etc. etc... and her number one pick? we built this city by STARSHIP. yes. that's right. very few people know this, but that may quite possibly be my favorite song of all time. it's so bad, and yet i love it. needless to say, i'm sold on Love Monkey.

now, if you didn't love Ed, you won't like this show. basically, tom cavanagh lifted his character from Ed, and plopped him into this show. personally, i love his bumbling wit, so i'm in heaven.

watch it!

special baby

helloooooooooooooooooooo!! mike and i had a sonogram appointment this morning...










































































it was moving around like crazy... gonna be a dancer, just like daddy.

pea in the pod

i know i'm the last to post this, but...


















crazy, huh?!

i'll definitely post some emerging belly pics. i'll leave all the good narratives to daddy.

tee hee. daddy.

brilliant

if you haven't heard the jingle for this company yet, you really must. it's good for a giggle.

excuse me.

Wedding announcement in the only publications that really matter:

After traveling to Ireland to buy presents for all their friends, Steve and his bride, Aly, will make their home somewhere on planet earth, so long as it allows little yappy dogs. Steve will make his millions as a manager in some high falootin’ bank or something and Aly is to become the first person ever to pass the bar in all 50 states and whatever the equivalent is in Canadia. They are to be married next week amongst loving friends and family and then will drink like it is their job and dance like they’re good at it. The second most important decision they made (after his FINALLY proposing to begin with) was to include Michael Garvey as a groomsman because, let’s face it, he looks damn good in a tux. The bridegroom is a graduate of college (both “clown” and “barber”) and the bride has obtained a degree from the school of hard knocks.

i can feel the love

alright, you've convinced me. since aparently, there are actually seven of you who read this, that is reason enough to post.

The Top Ten Things I Did Today:

10. woke up
9. shared a nice bowl of cereal with my friend Ellen Degeneres
8. did a crazy amount of laundry (spurred by the fact that i had nothing to wear to work)
7. folded said laundry
6. made chili, so mike would have a nice dinner tonight
5. packed my dinner for work
4. voted
3. went to work
2. found out i was off
1. came home and blogged it.

thank you.

it's been katie's birthday for a month

i don't update my blog. shocking, i know. so, instead of having all three of you click on the marshmallow world link every day, only to see that i haven't updated, i think i'll convince mikey to give me a shout-out on the toybox when i do. ta!

the other sister

happy birthday, hot stuff.

bringin' home the bacon

well, kids, it happened. i picked a career, started a job, and today, i got my very first paycheck.

woo hoo!

accordingly, mike and i are going to ikea tomorrow. want anything?

eat your heart out anne geddes

baby julia was more than happy to indulge aunt lisa...

blog envy

my sister asked me to update my blog, so i've been sitting here starting blog after blog, one lamer than the next. and then i thought, hmmm... maybe i should make a list of things i would write about if i could write as well as my in-house hemmingway. kinda like, if i could paint, i'd want to paint like jack vettriano... or if i could have my own cooking show, i'd want to be rachael ray.

ok, so if i was blessed with the gift of writing i would write about...

the three boys living above me.
how much i love the elmwood neighborhood i'm living in.
a psychiatric patient who has his shoelaces taken away.
how i met my husband.
my two years in dominica.
the squirrel who lives in the tree outside my house... and how he scares me.
my parents... both sets.
the places my car has been.
my new-found love for decorating a home.
my true affection for musical theatre... and my envy of people that are so good at it.
marshmallows.
the brilliance of kettle corn.
my sister who saved a bald eagle last night.
the past two months and two moves.
my niece who makes me melt.
italy.
how i wish i was an amazing photographer.
why i quit piano lessons... and how i wish i hadn't.
the day my grandfather told me mashed potatos were really called "fortuna."
the squirrel who is looking at me through the window. seriously.

fair weather blogger

i haven't been blogging lately. obviously. i just don't feel like i have anything riviting enough to share... i'll try just sharing the events of my day.

i bought some roman shades today. woo hoo! pier one sale + naked windows in new apartment = pure joy.

the end.

ps - i start my new job tomorrow!! new blogging material will follow...

beam me up

happy birthday, scott!

i couldn't make this up if i tried

a little background:

mike and i have a new apartment, and have begun the painting process. i picked out a shade of white, basically, that is really not what i expected. so, i called sears to see if they can add anything to it to make another color. i talked to a guy named jason who said he would be there for the rest of the night. awesome.

i walked into sears this afternoon, and located the lone salesman in the paint department.

me: hi! are you jason?!

he turned around, and in front of me was napoleon dynamite. seriously. give or take about 20 pounds. a curly bush on top of his head, giant glasses, and an overbite that made me shudder. and the. same. voice.

jason dynamite: (as he looked down at his name tag) i guess.

me: great! i talked to you about possibly changing the shade of paint i bought.

jd: oh yeah. why don't you just give it to your boyfriend.

me: well, 'cause he doesn't need two gallons of white paint.

jd: oh. well, it depends on the shade of paint you want, and whether or not color needs to be added or subtracted. if it has to be added, yes. if it has to be subtracted, no. because you can't subtract color.

me: gotcha. well, i need a gallon of this color, "home spun." can you make one of the gallons into that?

jd: i'm pretty sure i can.

me: it needs to be an exact match, jason, because it's a second coat.

jd: it will be pretty close.

me: ok, jason. i don't think i can bank on that. is it possible to return paint? if it won't get you in trouble i would love to do that and just start over.

jd: oh i won't get in trouble. i'm the section leader here. i'm not the manager or anything, so i can't make those kinds of decisions, but my manager does look to me to lead.

me: awesome. well, i would really like that.

jd: you know, you're really energetic. did you have your coffee today?

me: i'm more of a diet coke girl, myself ('cause i like the taste, not 'cause i need it.)

jd: that's ok. one of my friends drinks two 2 Liters of jolt every day.

me: wow

jd: yeah. well, that's also my friend that drinks hot sauce right out of the bottle.

me: crazy. so how 'bout that return?

jd: (looking a the receipt i produced) whoa, you bought a lot of stuff. new house?

me: yep.

jd: lucky.

me: (don't laugh, lisa, don't. laugh.)

jd: so are there wedding bells in your future?

me: actually, i just got married.

jd: oh.

at this point, jason started mixing one color up for me, while i left the spot to go to the next aisle to look at color swatches. all of a sudden, i hear...

jd: i was engaged... once.

me: (this is too good. must. keep talking.) oh really?! didn't work out?

jd: naw. she thought the world of me. but her grandma didn't like me very much.

me: ah. well, better to find these things out early.

i proceeded to pick out another color, and check out.

me: well, jason, you have neem a huge help! thank you so much, and have a great night!

jd: yeah, i'm gonna have some fun tonight. (beat. beat.) takin' care of grandma.

face lift

i went to the elmwood arts festival this weekend, which i love, and saw this:

faces of buffalo

i think it's a really neat idea, so draw yourselves!

lmg

i went to the dmv today! 20 minutes and $5.00 later, i was officially a Garvey.

then i signed my new license "Lisa Battaglia."

awesome.

second honeymoon

reason #2: (to come to albany)

we won't be here.

yep. mike and i have enjoyed our albany excursion, but UB Law beckoned, and it only took us a few beers to realize another move was in our future. our near future.

founding fathers, anyone? albany is seriously lacking in the free-popcorn department.







i spotted this snappy dresser in rome. all posts are better with pictures :)

project albany

so everyone knows we've moved east. much to our delight, it's proved to be a pretty snazzy city. so, for the next handful of posts (which will probably take me a month to compose) i give you "project albany: reasons you should visit us."

reason #1:
larkfest. we live in this sassy little neighborhood, centered around lark street. on september 17th, we will be 5 houses away from larkfest, an all-day festival, complete with food, shopping, and the dandy warhols.

so come, already.

you border on the adriatic

how many days in a row have you checked this measly little site to see if my mug was still the most recent addition?

that many, huh?

i'm sorry. two weeks turned into 4... allow me to sum up:

july 9th, wedding. awesome.

july 11 - 26, italy. also awesome.

july 27 - 30, pack all earthly posessions. slightly less enjoyable.

july 31st, move to new home with new husband. priceless.

ha! that was such a poor use of that joke. i'm sorry, i really am. all kidding aside, though, our new place in albany (fondly known as albania) is fantastic. we're expecting a couch delivery tomorrow, so the garvey residence is officially open for visitors. come! see the capital! have a burrito!

a marshmallow wedding

best. day. ever.

see you in two weeks!

ju ju bee

ok, so i haven't posted for a while. surprise surprise. i could say "i'm so busy, working, wedding, blah blah blah blah blah."

instead, i'll just introduce you to my first neice, Julia Eagan.

my eyes are still puffy.

i knew this was coming...

well guys and dolls, the day has come. i knew eventually, i would be memed with a topic i was horribly ignorant about, and that day has come.

books.

sure, i read, but while jess is reading The Pelopponesian War, i'm reading The Peasant Blouse, is it Making a Comeback?

so...yeah. this one scares me, but i'll give it a shot.

Number of books I've owned:
hmmm...not too many. most of the good books i've read have been because someone said to me "here, read this book." i do own some of my favorite children's books, though.

Last book I bought:
a guest book for the wedding (which, by the way, is in 13 days. oh. my. God.).

Last book I read:
honestly, i can't even remember the last time i read for leisure. i know, i KNOW, that's horrible. lately, though, i've been spending some real quality time with my NCLEX review book so i can pass my RN licensing exam. helloooooooooo, nurse!

Five books that mean a lot to me:
ok, this i can do. The Monster at the End of this Book, by Grover. yes. sesame street grover. i'm not kidding - it's a great book.

Muppet Manners. this book is brilliant. and histerical. "if you absolutely must tap-dance at the table, at least do it behind your napkin." words to live by...

I Know This Much is True. *gasp* a real book?! yes. i actually did read this book, and i thought it was wonderful.

Emily Post's Etiquette. this one was on loan from my future mom-in-law, and i used it faithfully. who knows how to stuff a wedding invitation? emily does. who knows how to address an envelope when the wife is a doctor and the husband is a cross-dresser?! just ask emily.

ok, i can only think of 4. and since every blogger i know has been memed, i tag leah!

tally ho

what do you call a pastry chef whose restaurant was recently purchased by this guy?


a pastie chef.

alright already

i've grown tired of the blog. can you tell? after a week of no posts, people will think i've abandoned ship, and even worse, mike will take me off his list of links. so, here's a little story...

somewhere around february, i set up two people i know on a date. i don't usually do this, in fact, i've never done this. this particular duo, however, seemed they might click. my intentions, although seemingly honerable, were laced with a bit of... how you say... "maybe-if-you-hit-it-off-you'll-stop-calling-me."

well hot damn, it worked. yesterday, after nearly four months of no contact, i got a call. the first words out of his mouth were "i have to thank you; even though it didn't work out, it was one of the best relationships of my life."

wow. i. am. shocked. yes, i wanted them to go on a date, and yes, i am certainly happy that it resulted in something wonderful for both of them, but c'mon. it was a totally selfish act... that just happened not to bite me in the ass.

so i've bee thinking... if i did that well without trying, am i capable of greater things? i looked up the definition of "matchmaker," and found "self-employed 'busybody'."

have you met me? i'm putting it on a business card.

thunderstorms, cool or scary

last night, scary. i'm all for a good natured thunder storm now and then, but YOWZA last night was a doozy. it was the "someone's-in-my-bedroom-throwing-grenades-at-me" kind of thunder.

so i did what any self-respecting 27 year old would do; plugged my ears, closed my eyes really tight and sang a little happy song in my head.

30 days... but who's counting

esther is right - although queer-eye is one of the most important fixtures of my weekly schedule, there are plenty of life events that deserve some press. namely, a day blocked off on my calendar, exactly one month from today, when i will become mrs. royal toybox.

at this point, all the major players are set. i have a list of things to check off before the big day, but nothing too overwhelming. i had a trilogy of fabulous showers in as many weeks, and the generosity of people astounds me. we've received so many thoughtful and generous gifts over the past few weeks... by the way, if you haven't had the pleasure of registering for things, i highly recommend it. getting a new apartment? register. having a baby? definitely register. your towels are kinda faded, but your birthday is coming up? register! seriously... it's not just for weddings anymore.

so anyway, i think i've got all my bases covered, and i'm not really feeling stressed, but if dreams are any indication, my subconscious is having a nervous breakdown. over the past week, i've been dreaming a lot- i can't remember all of them, but two were too vivid. in the first, we were at the reception, and after dinner all my bridesmaids left. every singly one of them. they told me they were "going home to change," but they never came back. as the night wore on, my father and i had our dance, and the band started playing a waltz. my father acted as if this was the plan all along, and launched into some elaborate choreography, in which i fell no fewer than three times because i didn't know the steps. then, to top the night off, i forgot to buy the favors, but i had remembered the containers - in other words, all the containers that were meant to hold the favors were set out on the table, but they were completely empty. on to dream two, where our mode of transportation to the reception was a large boat, but our ride was halted by giant snakes in the water of the boa constrictor variety. because of the snakes, we had to stay on the boat in the middle of the lake or whatever, and we never made it to the party.

*sigh*

in the grand scheme of things, none of the fluff matters... at the end of the day, i will still be mrs. happiest woman in the marshmallow world, and the royal toybox and i will live happily ever after.

fab five fan

the season premier of queer eye is on tonight. look alive, people.

stop on green

now i could be totally wrong, but do pedestrians have the right of way on a green arrow? i don't think they do. as a driver, i love the green arrow... much to my chagrin, however, it seems all old ladies with walkers also love the green arrow, and take it upon themselves to cross as soon as they sees that flash of green. then i get very mad at said old ladies, but don't honk because i'm afraid i will only slow the process further. and possibly cause a heart attack. *humph*

please advise.

vanity

hey everyone. remember when i wrote on my blog? that was awesome.

i started tanning this week. i know, i know... i really couldn't do anything that's worse for my transparent complexion, but it is because of my transparent complexion that i must tan! only for a little while. 4 weeks to be exact. i just want enough color so that my skin doesn't match my dress.

so i went to the tanning place, having last been there about 5 years prior (probably in anticipation of a senior-something-or-other) and i didn't really remember the routine. not wanting to be the "newbie," however, i played along like i was a pro (i may have given it away, though, when i requested only 5 minutes, which is only 1 minute higher than an albino infant would request...). i went in, gave the girl my name, and she told me i was "all set in room 5." on my way to room 5, though, i saw the ladies room, and decided i would sneak in a quick stop. i left the bathroom, and went right into room 5. as i was disrobing, i noticed a timer on the wall that was counting down, and it was at 3 minutes. "3 minutes?! what does that mean?! i asked for 5, and now it's at 3, and does that mean i just wasted 2 minutes peeing?! get undressed... HURRY!!" i furiously took off what needed to be taken off, jumped into the bed, and reached behind me and hit start. "AHHHH!! i forgot my eye thingie-doeys!!" i hopped out, grabbed the thingies, and got back into the bed. luckily, the timer reset to 5, and all was right with the world. afterward, i got dressed, walked out, and hoped that no one heard my thrashing-about.

i'll be better tomorrow.

lucky charms

on this fine memorial day, i share with you a very memorable moment from the past year; duane! yes. duane is a little person. and yes. he is dancing on the bar.

God bless America.

voice lust

so for the past few days, i've had this raspy, cold-induced voice. at first, it was kinda fun. people i know knew i must be sick, but it was ok because the voice was a cool, could-be-a-radio-show-host or 1-900-number-employee kind of voice. and people i didn't know really didn't question whether or not it was my real voice.

today, the voice has changed to squawky (is that a word?) old- man-who-smokes-12-packs-a-day kind of voice, with a little touch of pre-pubescent-boy-with-frequent-voice-cracks-that sound-like-yelps.

oh so attractive.

three things

three names you go by:
1. lisa
2. lise
3. lisa-loo
three screen names you have had:
1. peano
2. tropicaldoc78
3. battagliastic
three physical things you like about yourself:
1. my current “kathleen turner/cold induced” voice
2. my hair
3. my toes. really, i think i have nice toes.
three physical things you don’t like about yourself:
1. my hair, after a bad cut
2. my fingernails
3. my thyroid gland
three parts of your heritage:
1. italian
2. irish
3. german
three things that scare you:
1. illness
2. being unemployed
3. losing people close to me
three of your everyday essentials:
1. mike
2. cereal
3. pajamas
three things you’re wearing now:
1. jeans
2. flip-flops
3. way too much make-up
three of your favorite bands or musical artist:
1. joss stone
2. audra mcdonald
3. kelly clarkson. yeah, i said it.
three of your favorite songs:
1. good mother by jan arden
2. case of you by joni mitchell
3. don’t you worry ‘bout a thing by stevie wonder
two truths and a lie:
1. i’m getting married
2. i’m going to italy
3. my middle name is sugar face
three physical things about the preferred sex that appeal to you:
1. height
2. smile
3. shoes
three of your favorite hobbies:
1. cooking
2. beading
3. watching tv. while cooking and beading.
three things you want to do really badly right now:
1. wash my face
2. watch tv
3. eat a marshmallow
three careers you’re considering:
1. nurse
2. mother
3. party-planner
three places you want to go on vacation:
1. italy
2. australia
3. alaska
three kids names you like:
1. grace (although gracie garvey is a bit much…)
2. lila
3. joshua
three things you want to do before you die:
1. be in a play
2. have a garden
3. be a mom
three ways that you are stereotypically a girl/boy:
1. i easily have 4 outfits on my bed before i decide what to wear
2. i don’t know how to change a flat tire
3. i’m a little obsessed with flip flops
three celebrity crushes
1. hugh grant
2. will smith
3. mandy patinkin
three people who are now memed:
esther! (you’re not busy, right?)
emmett pumpkin!
racheal!

bloggers block

i've been memed! thank goodness... i was considering writing about what i had for dinner last night, because i can't think of a darn thing. stay tuned for my "three things."

enigma wrapped in a mystery

i hate it when i burn microwave popcorn. yet, i like burned popcorn.


riviting post, huh?

pomp and streisand

graduations came in threes this weekend... mikey graduated on saturday night with his mba (woo hoo!), i graduated sunday with my nursing degree, and my cousin rachael had her high school graduation on monday night. all were very lovely and ceremonial... pomp and circumstance abounded, along with other various meditations, such as pachelbel's canon and a handful of mozart's sonatas... that is, of course, until my name was called. it was as if the powers that be somehow knew of my unnatural affection for the broadway musical... so much so, that it called to the gay man in all of us... as the dulcet notes of "people" ran through the auditorium.

classic.

aidan nolte

on the left is one of my favorite little friends, aidan. on the right, his biological father.*

*aidan's actual biological father is scott, and he's a pretty damn good one, at that.

not title-worthy

would someone update this blog, already?! *sheesh*

i had plans of writing, what i thought, would be a really funny post about trying to explain the meaning of "circumcision" to a non-english speaking mom. it's a true story, and in my mind, it's hilarious! but when i tried to convert it to text, i realized there were far too many hand gestures that really do make the story. sorry.

today was mike's graduation from the mba program. woo hoo!! we tried out this great place called allen street hardware for dinner and drinks after the ceremony... good times.

happy belated birthday, cecilia!! cecilia invited us to her 24th birthday party at chuck e. cheese. do you know they serve beer there? somehow, the beer made the screeming 7 year olds trying to steal my ski-ball tickets slightly more tolerable.

that was a sufficiently random post, no? i feel like a real blogger.

nubbin

i picked up this book while babysitting today. allow me to read you the first two lines:

ahem.

"i'm your nubby puppy friend. rub my nubs from end to end."

do i really need to follow that with a joke?

chicken or beef

t-minus 60 days to the big day.

fair weather blogger

i've been working* nights for the past few weeks, and i just got off a 4 night stretch. it's such a BEAUTIFUL day today, though, that sleeping seems like a crime. so... yep. i'm tired.

just on a quick sappy note, i cried during a delivery last night. i tried my darndest to hide it... i don't know if it would weird the parents out to see a stranger crying at the birth of their child. i can't help it, though. especially if the parents get weepy... man, i picture some pretty bad things to keep my eyes from welling up. what i don't understand, though, is why everyone isn't crying! i mean, sure, it is a little bloody and gooey, but c'mon... these people just made a person.

*sigh*

go outside and play, already, will ya'.

*by "working" i actually mean "going to the hospital and doing stuff, but still paying tuition."

poor kid

hi. i'm back. the blog and i went through some difficult times. we're seeing a therapist, and we're working through our demons. anyway, just thought i'd share a little funny from the nursery last night. i went in on a delivery, and it went very smoothly. the parents were lovely... taking lots of pictures, weepy, coochie-cooing, etc. i was weighing the little peanut, and dad came over to the scale. he's snapping pictures, and i nonchalantly asked "does he have a name?" "oh yes! it's a little difficult, but it's 'Ah-bee-jay.' "

At home, he'll join his siblings, Moe Lester, Anita Mann, and Ben Dover.

bloggy blues

dear bloggy,

i've been having these feelings lately... strange feelings. my baby blog is merely a month old, and i'm already feeling bored with it. i don't know bloggy, it's just not the instant gratification i was hoping for. everyone else likes their blogs!! they write to them, share with them, laugh with them, take them for long walks on the beach... and then there's me. for my blog, i feel... blah. does that make me a bad blogger?! i sit with it, and i try to talk to it, but i just feel like we have nothing to talk about. so bloggy, if you have any suggestions for things my blog and i can share with each other, please let me know.

sincerely,

bummed blogger